Magrilless

Five days ago, things were different than they are today.

Five days ago it was summer. Now the hill behind our house is more than flecked with yellows and reds and oranges. The heater, set at 50 degrees, came on this morning. We no longer have two squash per plant to harvest and eat every single day. I have cooked in the oven and there are spiders in the corners of the house.

Five days ago Maggie wore diapers. Just to bed, but still — diapers. Then she decided to get up in the middle of the night to pee and complains when I try to wrestle her into a pullup at bedtime. Looks like I may have bought my last package of diapers. For a couple of months. When did this baby turn into a kiddo who climbs trees and carries the recycling out to the curb and sings the months of the year in order?

Five days ago I was blissfully six months pregnant. Now I am third trimester pregnant, which is pretty much the same in all ways except for the bliss part. All of a sudden I have backaches during the day and my hips throb at night. Biangi stretches up into my lungs and catches me short of breath when s/he’s not stretching down into my bladder and making me run for the nearest loo. I struggle up the hill home from walks and fall asleep at 9 and flop and heave in and out of the car.

A lot can change in five days.

I felt a little guilty about no new picture last week, so this time you can have four. This is Maggie and her friend Julia and what we spent an hour doing at the park yesterday. The dogs loved it, the kiddos loved it, the parents loved the nap afterward.

So Maggie’s new phases: (1) Besides the asking for a million things before resigning herself to bed, she also gets up exactly once sometime in the middle of the night to take off her blankets and then request that we put them back on her. I asked her if she wanted sheets like Daddy and I have on our bed, but she told me “one day, when I’m grown up.” (2) She has decided she will only wear dresses. Sometimes if she’s very distracted I can throw on a shirt and shorts/skirt before she realizes what’s going on. And then she’ll be pacified when I acquiesce and also let her wear her tutu (as in the park pictures). (3) We have gotten to the stage that all parents dread: “why?” Of one of her little action figures this morning she asked why he was wearing boots. “Because those are the shoes he felt like wearing this morning.” “Why?” “Because they protect his feet when he’s swordfighting.” “Why?” “If he was wearing sandals, his toes could get cut off.” “Why?” “Because he’s not a very good swordfighter and he needs a lot of protection.” “Why?” “Maybe he’s just learning how to swordfight.” “Why?” “Would you like a big bite of oatmeal?”

But in the school department, we’re doing great. Last week we had really good partings at school, even though she told me each morning that she didn’t want to go to school. This morning she never said she didn’t want to go, she gave me a kiss when I carried her into her class, and trotted off with her teddy bear in arms. Whew!

I’ve been pretty lazy about taking pictures this week. So this is a blast from the past; how much has Maggie grown in just one year?! Really, click on this picture and see how tiny she looks.

Our bedtime battles continue. She is at least no longer screaming at the top of her lungs for the neighbors to call the cops on her abusive parents (or just screaming). But now she is hopping out of bed and standing in her doorway sweetly asking for inane things over and over again. We say goodnight and shut her door. Thirty seconds later: patter-patter-patter “Mommy? I need some more books.” I go in and oblige and now she has seven books in bed with her where it’s too dark to read. I say goodnight and gently remind her that to get an ice cream sticker she has to stay in bed. One minute later: patter-patter-patter “Mommy? I’m thirsty.” I tell her to get back in bed and I’ll bring her her squeeze bottle with some water. Then “I need my blankets on.” “Neenee needs socks on.” “I want more water.” “I want more friends in bed.” “I don’t want any friends in bed.” And my favorite, “I need something else.” She’s so nice about it and it’s so much quieter and more civilized than just a week ago that it’s hard to be firm. This too shall pass, however, and hopefully before she’s six (like me).

Otherwise, we’ve been very much social butterflies. Several barbecues, some impromptu dinners with friends, play dates and lunch dates here and there. Maggie has been very happy with this. And it’s helped me get her to school without too much fuss. “After I pick you up from school, we get to go to a party at Dave’s house. But you have to go to school first!” (She has tried negotiating “Party first, school second” but she thankfully understands the concept of meal times. Dinner parties have to come after lunch at school.) I have decided to hope for a second extrovert in the family; Maggie would like the company and it might take some of the pressure off us introverted parents.

Oh, Maggie. She has decided to be a little contrary lately. When it’s a school day she insists she does not want to go. Then when it’s a day off, she’ll ask if she can go. (School is a work in progress. I think she underestimated the amount of new things she’d have to learn just to operate in the classroom. And she told me there are too many kiddos. But we’re role-playing at home, me playing Ms. Kim, in hopes that she’ll get a little more confident in her new surroundings. And yes, I do abuse my acting role sometimes, saying things like “Pretend I’m Ms. Kim and I just told you to go pee; what would you do?”) After swallowing a few bites of muffin she’ll ask what’s in it. “Squash from our garden.” “I don’t like squash,” and she’ll refuse to eat the rest. When asked what choice she’d like to make, A or B, she’ll often make up a nonsense word for an answer and think it’s hilarious. But it’s not so funny when mom or dad then makes the choice for her. Bedtime has also been a bit of a struggle for the past couple of weeks. It’s like she just decided she would like to have a fight at the end of the day. So we’ve now instituted a sticker chart where if she goes quietly to naptime or bedtime, she gets a sticker. Then after five stickers she gets to go to the ice cream store and choose a flavor for a cone. We got our first cone yesterday. Woo hoo!

Not to say that it’s been a terrible week. For one thing, we got our “new” piano hand-delivered by the Albuquerque contingent and have all been practicing away! Maggie is especially cute on the piano bench. She’ll sit and put her hands on the keyboard, twinkling her fingers back and forth with her eyes shut and her head swaying from side to side as if to some beautiful melody. Quite endearing.